Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Pretty Good (But Not The Best) Steak In NYC & Some Thoughs On Extended Family

So R.'s Dad took us out to Keens Steakhouse near Madison Square Gardens last night. I'm usually not a huge meat-eater, but jeez was that porterhouse good. I mean, not as good as Peter Lugers, but still. Pretty good. And the apple cobbler wasn't too bad either.

It's weird how different our families are. I mean, R.'s family are all generations-long city-dwellers and firmly believe NYC is the best city in the entire world. Which is. Well. NY is great, but certainly not the best city. (San Francisco; Paris; Barcelona; Amsterdam. Sorry, Londoners--never been there).

My family members, on the other hand, eschews cities and are more comfortable on their farm or treking through mountains. Even my grandparents, who live on top of a mountain in northeastern Pennsylvania, had the most magnificent flower, vegetable and fruit garden back in the day.

Here's the sign at the entrance to my parents' home:

So merging the two families is a bit of a struggle. It's not that they don't like eachother or respect eachother, but their values and points of reference are so disparate. I always thought the blending of Jewish (R's family) and Protestant (mine) would be the most troublesome part, but really. It's the lifestyle thing that's the weirdest pill to swallow.

Maybe it's because we recently moved from Charlottesville (where my family lives) to NYC (where R.'s family lives) that all of the sudden, after two years of marriage and five years of cohabitation, this is really being driven home for me. But last night at that steakhouse? I've never felt further from where I'd started. Never felt more like the odd man out.


Blogger Red said...

Interesting post. But (if I may ask) what do you mean by "never felt further from where I started"? Is it that you feel you don't belong either in the city or back in the mountains? You feel... displaced? I don't want to put words in your mouth and maybe I'm waaaaay off the mark, but that's kinda like I feel (and often): Italian in England and English in Italy. Strange.

My family and Husband's have never even met -- and we've been together 10 years! But we always thought that if they did, they would have nothing in common. Plus, in their case, there would be the added issue of the language barrier...

10:40 AM  
Blogger Minerva Jane said...

Actually, you’re right—I feel displaced either place I am. I hated living in the country—missed the intellectual and cultural aspects of the city. Well, there’s also the fact that the american south can be... A little politically conservative. I know that comes as a shock... But sometimes, here in NYC, more so when I’m with R’s family than any other time, I feel so overwhelmed by it all... Of course, it’s only been a year. So who know how I’ll feel six months or a year from now... Other times I can’t believe how lucky I am to be here—so much going on at all times.

10:46 AM  
Blogger Martha Elaine Belden said...

wow... i love that eating a steakhouse produced such deep thoughts and even an epiphany of sorts.

i echo red... great post...

i'm from a really small town in west texas and now live in the big city. i've discovered i'm much more the metropolitan-girl... while my family loves country life in the middle of nowhere. i'm interested to see how the future plays out if/when i get married, stay in the city, etc.

oh, and thanks for your comments on my blog. i'm glad you stopped by... and i'm glad you enjoyed :)

3:21 PM  

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